The Ultimate Story of Laziness


    Joey was laying on the couch. It was a beautiful chilly December day. The wind was whipping and the sky was a grayish shade. A perfect day to be lazy and lay around. A huge snow was expected to come later that week in Seattle. Joey laid on the mushy old couch, packed tightly into the warm cushions with blankets and oversized pillows. He was watching his favorite show on television currently, House M.D. The sarcasm of Dr.House seemed to match Joey’s witty and pessimestic personality. That’s probably why he liked that show so much. It was a marvelously boring Sunday night. Every night was really boring in his house. But suddenly he heard a familiar and a very quiet sound.


   Joey heard a faint little sound. But with that sound he felt a vibration. He knew right where this sound and feeling came from, the stomach. He hadn’t eaten anything since breakfast this morning around 8AM. He had some scrambled eggs and toast with jelly and butter. It was now 8PM, and he was hungry. The hunger pains in his stomach kept all his attention on it. The problem with this is that Joey didn’t really feel like getting up. He was a lazy human being, and all his friends told him that on a daily basis. But this new issue doesn’t help the current issue of his empty, starving stomach. “What to do what to do” he say quietly to himself. He lifts his legs up off the couch and tries to stand up, but suddenly realizes that he isn’t in the mood to make the slightest little movement. He slides back into the couch and thinks.


   Feeling defeated by his lack of motivation and extraordinary laziness, he gives up on making anything for himself. I guess I’ll just sit here and starve. He thinks for a moment. “Is anyone home?” he thought to himself. Finally he remembered his mother was off of work today. Joey waited for a moment before he yelled. “MOM!” he screamed loudly. “MOM I NEED YOU TO MAKE ME SOME FOOD!” he yelled out again. “AW COME ON MOM!” he tried one last time. He knew for sure she was home, but apparently she wasn’t about to come downstairs and make him some food. Now what was he going to do? He sat and sat and sat some more until he couldn’t stand the aching rumbling in his stomach anymore. The food was viciously calling his name. He abruptly got up.  


     Joey got so aggravated that he got up to grab his iPhone 6 plus and do something about his problem. The sleek big phone was cold against his sweaty palms. (Joey gets a little nervous when he’s hungry.) He looks up the number for a pizza joint a couple miles away from his house. Scrolling through the search engines he finally finds the number he’s looking for. When he finds the number Joey calls and places his favorite order. He ordered one large pepperoni pizza and a large order of cheese bread. Just thinking about how yummy the food would be made his stomach growl even louder. He could just imagine how the cheese would spill off the pizza, he couldn’t wait. They told him it would be thirty to forty five minutes before it arrived. Joey was finally satisfied with the fact that he would be getting food very soon and so he waited patiently.
  After about thirty-five minutes, the piercing doorbell rang. It was the sweetest sound in the world to him right now. “The sound of joy”  he thought. Joey then realized that the thing he had been trying to avoid all along would still need to be done. He needed to pay the man. So he had to get up, or no pizza. Also, he had previously gotten up to get his phone to call the pizza place. Feeled stupid and discouraged, he slowly got up to go to the door. But realizing he was also still filled with hunger and excitement Joey took off, and sprinted towards the door yelling “I’M COMING I’M COMING PLEASE DON’T LEAVE!” When he reached the door he was panting and out of breath but he managed to crack a smile to the delivery man who seemed confused by the weirdness of the situation. Joey handed him his money and the tip. He sat down with his food and started inhaling it all. He was right, that cheese was falling off the pizza and the bread. He was still pleased with the outcome. He genuinely enjoyed that pepperoni pizza, it was the best dang pizza he had ever had.

Jeffersonville High School, 2016